Article: 250284 of rec.arts.books.tolkien Path: news.uchicago.edu!vixen.cso.uiuc.edu!howland.erols.net!portc.blue.aol.com.MISMATCH!portc03.blue.aol.com!audrey04.news.aol.com!not-for-mail Lines: 48 X-Admin: news@aol.com From: <<>> (David M. McCandless) Newsgroups: rec.arts.books.tolkien Date: 01 Sep 2001 02:44:15 GMT Organization: AOL http://www.aol.com Subject: e-text parody (5-3): The Blockbuster of Rohan [disclaimer, read 1st] Message-ID: <20010831224415.20048.00006415@mb-mv.aol.com> Xref: news.uchicago.edu rec.arts.books.tolkien:250284 As a habitual apologizer, I'll grovel one final time for the tardiness of this chapter. I was extremely excited when stumbling across this e-text a year ago, signed up, and promptly forgot all about it. And suddenly my number came up. Normally I can crank a parody off in a few days, but a few things complicated matters, some of which I didn't realize until I began to write: 1. I was in the middle of designing and programming a web site facelift. (Still am.) 2. I hate Merry. 3. Not much happens in "The Muster of Rohan." 4. Not many main characters appear (only Merry, Eomer, Theoden, and Eowyn). 5. I hate Merry. 6. I got writer's block. Over the 2-3 week period, I abandoned at least three drafts (the second being the "Austin Powers 2" variation) before finally settling on this one -- which I whipped out in two days flat. I'll also apologize now for any details I managed to muck up from the earlier chapters, it's really hard to keep it all straight even with the name list printed out in front of me. I'm expecting that you'll probably either love (I hope) or hate this thing, which breaks in a *large* way from the format of the other previous chapters in form and style. And this draft, I suppose, could also be called the "Farrelly Brothers version" in terms of humor, and it's way longer than I wish it would have been (though not as long as it looks -- scripts have extra spacing). But hey, it's a parody, and I tried my best, and if you don't like it, well, hey, just jump to the next one and keep enjoying the unfolding story. There are a few plot twists that could cause some fun (re: neurosis) for the next Rohan writer. But, as with any parody, they can be undone if you like them not. It's a lot like playing the game "Blockhead:" Most of the fun is trying to set up the next guy with the most bizarre, teetering pile of blocks you can create. Meanwhile, enjoy Otto and the Dwarf Acrobatic Team, and to Merry, I say only this: "Sayonara, sucker..." -- david http://www.BrothersGrinn.com "Funny in the head... where it counts." Coming Someday -- www.elandra.com